Talk:LOST on Wawanakwa
Poor Trent. He needs to find a new direction in life. Something other than Gwen. Maybe now he will. >:P Jay JLOMAny good or kindness I can show to any human being, let me do it now, for I shall not pass this way again.-Author Unknown 15:50, July 5, 2012 (UTC) Wow... this sounds like something I need to read! This is great so far, and it's only a prologue! Can't wait for more!--You shoot me down, but I won't fall 21:59, July 5, 2012 (UTC) Summer Schedule Comments Please do not edit this section, it is for the author and the host of the Summer Schedule to edit. Contestant Check-In Non-Contestant Check-In #Jessica Normal Chat Here is where all may resume chatting/commenting about the chapter! If you are a contestant in Summer Schedule, please put, in bold, somewhere in your comment: I READ THIS STORY AS PART OF THE SUMMER SCHEDULE. Thank you! Please write a comment at least three sentences long regarding how you liked the chapter! <3 Nice work, Jax. Nothing much to say but a good start to you. You already know what I liked and I didn't like so I'll keep this short. But, great start. I READ THIS STORY AS PART OF THE SUMMER SCHEDULE. <3 --If your undies are tight, it's uncomfortable. If you're a boy and your bra is tight, I'm uncomfortable 02:21, July 18, 2012 (UTC) So, after finally finishing the first chapter I realized it was based on Lost- Which ffr I can't stand... Yet I enjoy this story, whether it's because I like the characters, or just the feeling... It's very detailed, but I'm not sure if I'll keep reading it. Like I said, nota fan of Lost... :( ' I READ THIS STORY AS PART OF THE SUMMER SCHEDULE. [[User:Mrodd|'Forever Young']] [[User talk:Mrodd|'Talk']] 17:38, July 18, 2012 (UTC)' Wow, Jax... this is very detailed. I likey detailed. ;3 ;P Anyway, I really can't wait to read more. I never watched Lost, but this kind of makes me want to. ;P--You shoot me down, but I won't fall 18:40, July 18, 2012 (UTC) I like it, Jax. While Lost was the stupidest thing invented in history, (I automatically hate anyone who liked it, but in this case, I'll make an exception) I really liked this. Trey. It's short for Treyquisha. 22:15, July 19, 2012 (UTC) I agree with Zac and Trey. Lost for the loss. xD I read this finally, not expecting much considering it's relation to Lost. All I have to say right now: Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaam-This was by far, one of the most detailed, and intricate stories I've ever read. The way Duncan was protrayed was very different, yet not only believable, but just freakin' amazing. I'm so commenting on this. xD <3 :3 READ THIS STORY AS PART OF THE SUMMER SCHEDULE. Xaflan (talk) 23:55, July 19, 2012 (UTC) This be Alfan BTW< my account is STILL blocked. <~< This is a really good story. It is well written and detailed. I am excited to see more, can't wait! EDIT: ALRIGHT FINE JAX I'LL WRITE SOMETHING LONGER!!!! OK Here we go: After reading what ha been written I have some positive and negative comments on the story. Let's start with the positive. I really like the spin-off Lost concept as it sets up for an intriguing plot. Some parts of the story are really funny which is definitely a plus. I have to say the first-person parts about Duncan are my favorite parts to the story. The way that they are cut off makes it so interesting that I just have to read to get to the next one. I'm expecting some deaths in this story by the way, so optionally, if I was writing this, I would have a death count at the end of the story to help people keep track. Now for the negative comments: Excuse my failure at typing, but in some parts, the writing was not on par with the rest of the story. Some sections were rushed and happened to quickly. For example, you moved the story too quickly in the airplane section and I felt that a lot of the action or at least time lapse just disappeared without reason. I think you need to extend sections of the story or at least in the future, don't cut out large sections of time in future chapters. Also, this is more of an opinion rather than real constructive criticism, but the whole "eye" thing seems kind of out of place. I don't think it's a writing flaw but more just something that cannot be portrayed correctly in words. You kept mentioning camera's so I'm assuming that has some importance in the plot unless it is a writing mistake. Finally, some sections of dialogue need a little bit of work because the emotions are not portrayed strongly enough. This is difficult to do and few professional writers actually can pull it off. Anyways, to sum it all up, I am very interested with this story and am excited to see more, especially if some of the things I pointed out can be taken into consideration(but not required of course). Good luck with this story!Aimerstalk 03:44, July 21, 2012 (UTC) ---- I really like this story. I, in fact, will come back, even after the competition, to read this. Keep up the great work, Jax! ;3 18:10, July 25, 2012 (UTC) Nice chapter, Jax. I liked seeing Bridgette's flashback and it was interesting to find out her past. I was shocked at the twist when she said she had a fiance. You could work on your grammar in some areas, though. Good chapter overall! I READ THIS AS PART OF THE SUMMER SCHEDULE. [[User:Kgman04|'~ Kgman04!']] ♪''' [[User talk:Kgman04|'''Talk!]] ♫ 16:00, July 28, 2012 (UTC)